What Great Parents Don't Do

1. Great Parents Don't do the following

• Don't rescue or enable.

• Don't over react.

• Don't threaten or scare.

• Don't provide drugs or alcohol.

• Don't minimize your children's use.

• Don't bribe or use guilt.

• Don't be buddy, buddy with your kids. Kids know how to push your buttons.

• There will be plenty of opportunities to be friends when they leave home.

2. Be aware that drug use is a decision

• No-use/use (CHOICES) Abuse/addiction (NO CHOICE)

3. Understand reasons kids do drugs

• Peer pressure.

• Cultural influence.

• "Feels good."

• Escape. (dysfunctional family)

• Experimentation.

• Low self esteem.

4.  Take Control Of Your Home

1. It is vitally important for parents to take control of the home.

A. Tough Love: Parents set the standards. The kids come up to your standards, you don't drop to theirs. Kids know how to push our buttons. Don't try to be buddy, buddy with your kids. There will be plenty of time to become friends after they leave home. That means you have a family meeting with your kids.

B. We must be able to say no: Another way of spelling love is to say "NO." The easy way out is to give in and say yes, but it takes conviction to say no.

C. Expect the best; get the best: Naturally there will be those times when we will be disappointed, but over all this principle works.

D. The punishment should fit the crime: In an unemotional atmosphere, we have pretty much determined the consequences when we had the family meeting.

E. Keep our emotions under control: We gain nothing by becoming emotionally involved and getting all upset. Keep cool and in control.

1) Don't raise your voice!
2) Sit down and relax!
3) Relax your jaw!
4) Relax your fist!
5) Slow your breathing!
6) Breath 10

F. Dislike the behavior and not the child: We must communicate the fact that we don't dislike the child, but we certainly dislike the behavior and are not going to put up with it.

G. When ever possible discipline in private: Self respect remains in tack. The child is not forced to save face in front of their peers.

H. When the kids are away from home, take the opportunity to check their bedrooms: Go into the closet, smell their cloths (Alcohol, Marijuana).
Some parents say this is going to far, I trust my kids. That is great, trust your kids but not their friends. Ninety-five percent of the time, when kids get involved with drugs, it is usaully through a close friend.

I. Kids love to take trophies: T-shirts, hats, etc. Take time to read what is written on these, and if you don't know what it means, ask your kids.
(Just because your youngster is wearing a T-shirt that references drugs is not a guarantee that your youngster is doing drugs, but it is a clue!)

When teens feel understood and are paid attention to by parents and teachers, they are less likely to do (drugs, alcohol, smoke, and sex).

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